Ficky-Ficky Success?

Blasting my music, jamming out, living life as random as I could possibly do....the music came to a hault. 

Success is.......What?

In this superficial bubble, that is Howard University, success is defined as membership in numerous organizations, a decent (or maybe not so decent) GPA and popped hair  (in a males case nice clothes). But wait! If you live off of campus and have a car, your even more successful...right?

The free spirited aren't candidates for success supposedly, or maybe not the success warranted by the masses. They're the straight and narrow kind of kids I've never truly liked, they shoot one arrow up at a star and hope to land but, if you miss, then what? I live by the philosophy that states the opposite. Shoot several arrows at several different stars, your bound to hit one, if not all. 

Scatter-brain. Not like an idiot but, simply put...scattered. 

I don't think I can plan my life according to a five year plan, I'm too finicky for that...I'm too me , for that.

So...what is success?

Sunday, the pastor said, "if you rely on formulas for prosperity your bound to fail" ......I never did like formulas. 

:)

Where are you, me?

Seems as if I've been living in a lot of chaos lately, a piece of my sanity was left at BWI Airport on December 30, 2008 when I made my way to Atlanta for a week filled with debauchery, gluttony, blasphemy and all things irreverent. 

I suppose it was my 4.0 GPA or the fact that my father treated me to everything I asked for in the month of December. When my flight landed in Washington, DC on January 2, 2009....I starred blankly out of my window, longing to go back. Apparently I forgot to pick up my sanity at the baggage claim.

Hello '09

Why on earth would ANY text book be $200?

I might as well sell my soul to the devil to get that flimsy piece of paper that reads, "Bachelor of Arts" because it damn near costs the price of my life. This is my last semester of my third year. After this I'll have two. Frightening. I wonder what I'd have to sell next to afford Law School or Graduate School? Decisions.

Enough of the depressing Undergraduate student talk; Happy 2009 bloggers!

This is looking up to be a promising year. 2008 was definitely a year of blessings and risks. A lot of dots were connected for me last year. God willing, the dots will continue to connect and convey a pretty picture :)

 

Romans 12:12

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

Growth.

It's simple, the task is to grow and acknowledge the growth. Once you've acknowledged the road you've traveled you must succumb to the change. If not, the growth was in vain...or so it would seem. 

Self-less.

Now, more than ever have I put my own wants to the side. I've moved disposable things from my heart and created a crevice for another. 

Grow. Live. Accept. Succumb. 

Pathos.

Say it loud...

For a long time I was ashamed of being rich, being strong, being the ancestor to the mother of all mankind....but today, I'm twenty and able to appreciate me.

Black.

Power.

Unashamed.

Uninhibited.

Free.

Intelligent.

Striving.

In seven days I may be able to correctly and technically say, "my president is black."  My president may just be a black man. Yes, it holds a good ring to your ears for two years, but when you actually become conscious of the fact, it's indeed a wonderful feeling.

Black, I am. Proud, I am. Black is beautiful. Therefore, I am...

Simplistic Fall Air.

Simplicity is key.

It's the most simplistic piece of information one could give. Fall is here. The trees are dancing with the wind. The air is so crisp, not too cold, not too hot. Just right.

Comfortable are the months of October and November. Simplistic.

My Heavy Heart....

No longer will I mourn the death of my Aunt.No longer will I live within this box I have created for myself!

My aunt lived a long and prosperous life. She served others, never being selfish. A very humble woman, one in which I aspire to be. She raised my cousins the right way, she loved me the right way, she cared with genuine concern. I consign the peach trees, pine trees and pecans to her very existence.

Nature personifies us all.She reminds me of Zora Neale Hurston's,"Their Eyes Were Watching God"

Learning to find peace in not such peaceful places is daring, but I'm doing.

My heavy heart, is light...

RIP Aunnie.